First of all, be thankful you have a heart because your ex certainly hasn’t…
Secondly, do something you’ll really regret like cut off all of your hair, beg him to have you back, or write on your FB wall: My ex’s new girlfriend reads my blog. Is that weird or what? Or on his wall: Thanks for the memories, Asshole.
Next, contemplate suicide because that has always worked well in the past. After reading your tearful goodbye-cruel-world note he will instantly feel remorse for his stupid stupid stupid behavior and then kill himself. Problem solved.
Give in to donuts by the baker’s dozen, cheesecake by the wheel and alcohol by the volume. After all, you have nothing to look forward to so you might as well live it up now before your arteries crystallize and your liver explodes.
Send him a singing telegram. Cinderella’s “Don’t Know What You Got (until it’s gone)” is not only an excellent 80s ballad, and what a video eh? but outrageously appropriate and still relevant today.
Jump right in – right in the relationship pool that is! It’s healthy and natural to be in love! And it’s perfectly okay if you still have feelings for another person! This is why they call it playing the field! You’re covering all of your bases to ensure you catch that sweet home run. (Just remember to wear that catcher’s mitt otherwise you might catch something else during the game.)
Remember tattoos can be surgically removed or cleverly transformed into some very compelling and interesting designs. Billy Bob who? Your imagination is your limitation.
And dear, don’t tell yourself he will regret this decision. Because when you’ve lost your spiritual companion, your best friend and lover, you won’t feel like being right. You won’t feel like having all the answers, you’ll just want to feel peace again. Pick up the remote and turn off the mental movie.
So when the sting hits your eyes, your throat closes up and your heart drowns from sorrow, pull yourself up with both hands. Love has not abandoned you, it has transformed. The man you loved no longer exists; the man you loved would not have gone behind your back.
You’re not going to really cut off all your hair, are you?
“If you cannot accept what is outside, accept what is inside.” – The Power of Now